Beginnings

This is a session that I wrote for teachers meeting with students just beginning high school. I believe that it contains ideas relevant for all. Enjoy.

Beginnings

Kol Hatchalah Tzrichah El HaTachlit (- Mishlei Yisrael)

By Rabbi Neil Fleischmann

The first vaad is about focusing on beginnings in a practical and thoughtful way. While this applies to the vaad it also applies to the first meeting you have with this a freshman class; as their go to person you can make certain things clear in the first period. The first class that freshmen have in high school stays with them and so being their first period on their first day of school is a big responsibility. Students remember, or so they say, years later how their first teacher on their first day of high school made them feel.

There are many sources for the idea that beginnings are very important, that all goes according to the start. There is the famous saying (famous to teachers, not to freshmen students, generally speaking), and reality, of kol hatchalot kashot (Mechilta on Shmot 19:5). Rashi, on the beginning of this pasuk that famously calls us Am Segulah; “Ve’atah im shamoah, tishme’u el mitzvotai...” Rashi says, “If you accept Torah now it will be pleasant to you in the future: Shekol hatchalot kashot.” (Be’er Yitzchak questions this pshat because the double lashon is generally used for emphasis and not interpreted, though he suggests that the introductory word ve’atah allows for a drashah). Rashi comments similarly on the words we say three times daily – “Vehayah im shamoah tishme’u” – that if you listen at the start it gets easier in the future.

The Ran speaks in Drashot HaRan about how if the start is straight then what follows will be straight. Rabbi Yehuda Parness explained this with the example of drawing a line, two lines may look equal but if one of them is a bit curved then in time that seemingly insignificant curve will increase and make a great difference. Rashi says that Noach erred in planting a vineyard as it wasn’t the right choice for a foundation of the new world. The Maggid of Dubno builds on this with the example of a man who receives a bracha that the first thing he does when he gets home will multiply. He wants to count his money as soon as he gets home so that it will multiply. When he demands that his wife get the money they begin to fight and the arguing turns out to be what multiplies as it was the first thing he did when he got home. This ties in with the idea of eating sweet things and other simanim that we do on Rosh HaShana. More important that the symbolic foods we eat are the actions that we take, the way we behave at the start of the year.

Rav Kook explains Tefilat HaDerech (you can glean this from what he says) that it’s metaphorical and not about literal robbers and wild animals. Whenever a person changes from one atmosphere to another it is a turbulent time and a time in which we need – and pray for – extra siyata dishmaya. Rav Kook’s idea of the type of difficulty inherent in moving from one realm to another is well expressed in a recently published memoir, Beautiful Unbroken (page 180) ­­­­ by Mary Jane Nealon. The author writes that she experienced sadness as she drove home from work and didn’t understand it. She recalled something a wise friend said. “My friend Rachel in Chicago told me once that she cried all the time in the car on her commute home. She said there was something about the car’s cocoon and the pace of moving from one place in life, like work to another place, that tore at people’s souls.”

Rabbi Yosef Blau’s take on Yaakov’s wrestling match with the unidentified man that the medrash tells us was the mal’ach of Eisav (and some say was Ya’akov’s conscience) is relevant here:

Yaakov Avinu seems to always have people around him, a life filled with family, with one stark exception. In anticipation of re-meeting Eisav he prepares for battle, for a typical, physical war. Yaakov divides his camp strategically and advises them on how to deal with Eisav. He helps the fifteen members of his nuclear family cross the stream of Yabbok. Then, suddenly, briefly – though it probably feels like forever -Ya'akov finds himself unusually alone. “Vayivater Ya’akov levado – and Ya’akov was left alone (Breishit 32:25).” Then he is confronted by an unexpected enemy of an unworldly sort. There is no explicit documentation of his preparation for his spiritual battle. Ya'akov's life up until this moment was his preparation. There was no cramming for this exam.

Rabbi Blau sees this story as reflective of all of our lives. The major battles are spiritual and our sole preparation for the fights that count is the way we live the episodes of our lives up to the moment when we are tested. These conflicts are amorphous. When they arrive is unannounced and unknown. The physical challenges that we think we must prepare for, often never come. When the unexpected confrontations occur the people who usually travel with and support us can suddenly be absent from our surroundings. We can fight dark forces and win, but like Ya'akov we may come out limping. We can survive and thrive and, like Yaakov, in the end gain a new identity, sanctified through our spiritual victories. It is to our advantage to view these hurdles in a positive light.

The first place that the concept of beginning appears in the Torah is Breishit. The Ramban says that the theme of the beginning of the Torah, Breishit is that in life we get things and if we are responsible we hold on to what we have and if we are irresponsible we lose what we have. This occurs repeatedly in Breishit. Adam and Chava, Kayin, Dor HaMabul, Dor Haflaga, each lose what they were trusted with due to their mistakes. This continues into Avraham and his decedents getting the land which other nations lose the right to – all due to not meeting responsibilities.

This idea applies to all beginning, all situations in which we are trusted with something at the start. Students start off with fresh notebooks and sharpened pencils - as a clean slate. What happens next in largely in their hands. This fits with the parable about the butterfly (or bird) and how whether it alive or dead is up to the person who holds it, in their hands. It also fits with the anecdote about the man who was miserable about his packed tuna sandwich that he brought to work daily. After hearing him complain incessantly a neighbor asked why he didn’t ask his wife to make him something else, to which he replied, “I make my own lunch.”

Discussion Questions

Ask students –

What are examples of beginnings that you can think of? What is true about beginning? Describe the physical and emotional aspects of a beginning.

There saying goes that all beginnings are difficult. Do you agree with this? Why do you agree or disagree with this statement? What is easy about a beginning? Did you ever do something once at the beginning and then not keep it up? Why is that? What role does adrenaline play in a beginning, in a way, being easy?

What example can you give about you or someone you know (it takes pressure off to make it about someone else) having a hard time with something at the start and then finding it easier? (You can offer this true example of a Frisch graduate who was initially rejected and then wait listed because she had never worked hard in school. She was accepted, became an extremely diligent and successful student – to the extent that people found it hard to believe her true story). How does this apply to the start of high school? Do you think it will apply again next year?

If a baseball team starts a season feeling like they have no shot at the World Series, how does this effect how they play? How does this apply to life?

The start of the school year and Rosh HaShanah usually coincide. What do these times have in common, particularly regarding the nature of beginnings?

What does it feel like when you switch from one setting to another? How often do these kinds of changes occur? What can one do to try to help the changeover go as smoothly as possible? How often do these kinds of changes happen? (In a way they happen often – school to home, home to school. On the other hand big changes like elementary school to high school don’t happen as often).

How do you prepare for a new situation? In what ways can’t you prepare. Let’s say a teacher assigns a test. What are two different ways to approach studying for the test (in terms of when you start to study)? Does this apply to other situations in life? Explain. How might it be the case that this applies to all of life?

Eventually in school you receive grades. On the first day of school you do not have a grade. Do you think if a teacher had to give everyone in the class a grade, would they say everyone starts with a hundred, or that everyone starts with a zero? What would you say? What responsibilities are students trusted with at the start of the year? What happens when you do or don’t live up to these responsibilities? If you err is what follows a punishment or a consequence?

If you make mistakes at the start, can you change for the better? Explain? How does this tie in with the connection between the start of the school year and the month of Ellul and its theme?

Ask students lead in questions about their switch from elementary school. Do they have friends in the class? In the grade? Are they nervous? (I wouldn’t put them on the spot, but just put the question out there).

Consider telling them that it’s normal to be nervous, and perhaps to share that some adults are nervous on the first day of school, maybe even yourself.

Ask them what practical questions they have and help them know who’s who and what’s what. This includes roles of various administrators, locations of offices, even locations of bathrooms.

In the end the logistical and the ethereal connect. Bring it together and try to make students as comfortable as possible with their normal human discomfort in a new stage and place in life.