Mountains Upon Mountains

We Have Come So far To Go Back Alone

In the middle of a day of work and fulfillment and meaning and a dab of stress it's nice when you discover a song that you like the first time you hear it. I heard Greg Brown's version, but it's not on YouTube. He wrote it.

Forgive Us: A Reading for the Dating Penitent

- Prayer composed by Esther Kusthanowitz

[In each stanza, the first line is for women, the second for men, the third for all. Just as in the traditional Al Cheits, not everything is included and one may need to add their own - so too here. Just like in the traditional liturgy you confess things you may not have done, but people in your community have done so - so too, this is a prayer for the single community. - RNF]

For the sins of men against women. And for the sins of women against men. For all of these transgressions, O God of forgiveness, pardon us, forgive us, grant us atonement.

We said we'd call. We said we'd call back. We were dishonest with you and with ourselves.

We have let the ball drop. We have refused to pick up the dropped ball. We have preferred the safety of solitude to the instability of possibility.

We have rejected you for being too fat or too plain. We have rejected you for being too short or too bald. We have judged you according to external appearances and drawn assumptions from the superficial.

We have detested you for being too materialistic. We have detested you for being too superficial. We have hated you in our hearts.

We have told you that you were "like a sister" to us. We have told you that you were "a really great guy." We have lacked the fortitude to transition friendship into romance, and consigned you to the torment of "The Friend Zone."

We have blown you off on the street and in front of our friends. We have pretended not to see you in bars and at singles events. We have behaved poorly and inhumanely, in favor of maintaining our own comfort.

We have demanded too much, too soon. We have pressured you into emotional commitment. We have operated according to our own interests and agendas, unconcerned with your feelings or opinions.

We have eschewed dating in favor of hot wings and professional sports. We have eschewed dating in favor of Cosmos and "Sex and the City." We have escaped into comfort zones of food, alcohol and television to avoid potential heartbreak.

We have asked for your business cards at parties, even though we had no intention of calling. We have waited by the phone for the call you had implicitly promised. We have lived in communicational deception and delusion.

We have bantered too freely, creating a perceived depth to dialogue that was meant only at face value. We have flirted without follow-up, using subtle encouragement to convey enigmatic interest. We have left you in confusion, pondering the true intentions of our fearful hearts.

We have proposed second dates we had no intention of confirming. We have accepted second dates we had no intention of attending. We have chosen a slow fadeout over honesty, denying you the dignity of a truthful closure.

Together:

For the sins of men against women. And for the sins of women against men. For the sins of dating on the Internet. And for the sins of dating in real life. For all of these transgressions, O God of forgiveness, pardon us, forgive us, grant us atonement.

Sundry Quotes and Thoughts

"Let's be kind to each other - not forever, but for real." - David Wilcox

It's much easier to have a relationship with 10,000 people than it is with one." - Joan Baez

‎"We mostly watch it at home. I got my Oscar up above my television set; we just sit there and say, well, got mine, how you doin’?" - Ernest Borgnine, when asked if he and his wife of 38 years go to the Academy Awards." (Borgnine is 94.) (Read more here)

Everyone has a little bit of good in them, you just have to know where to find it. - My Cab Driver, Recently, talking about his job, my job, life.

‎"One never knows, do one?" - Aint Misbehavin'

‎"Let the bucket of memory down into the well, bring it up. Cool, cool minutes. No one stirring, no plans. Just being there. This is what the whole thing is about." - William Stafford

‎"Even my money keeps telling me it's G-d I need to trust." - Joan Baez

‎"Disappointment, I've learned, can be a very good friend -- shattering illusions." - Carrie Grossman

"If someone cannot say No to another person when it is necessary, neither will he be able to deny his evil impulse" - Rav Aryeh Levine (A Tzaddik in Our Time, pg. 415)

"Salad is a promisary note that food will soon arrive" - John Pinette

"Just remembering that you've had an and when you're back to or makes the or mean more than it did before." - Into the Woods.

"Sheleg katzemer" - snow protects the earth from the cold - keeps the roots warm, saves that which grows.

"Jealousy, desire, and honor remove a man from this world." - How does this statement of Chazal resonate/what does it mean for you?

I am now the proud owner of a djembe drum. If you are familiar with how to play one, kindly speak up.

You may have heard that the admonition (in negative and positive frames) to be kind to strangers appears in in the Chumash more than any other law. This is not mere street Torah but comes from Bava Metziah 59b, where we're told that this law is stated no less than 36 times.

"A Fighting Spirit Won't Save Your Life"

This op-ed piece (pasted/posted in comments) from the Times on January 24, 2011 struck me. It reminded me of a piece by Rabbi Benjamin Blech called "Don't Blame the Victim," which appeared in Newsweek on Sept. 19, 1988, p. 10.

Positive thinking can do a lot. Do you think that it can beat out anything to save a person's life?

And These Are The Mishpatim

Rashi comments on the words, "Ve'ileh hamishpatim - and these are the civil laws" that the letter vav connects this to what preceded it - "vav Mosif Al HaRishonim"-. Rashi elaborates, sayng that just as what's come before is from Sinai, so too what is about to be stated now is from Sinai.

Rav Shlomo Yoseif Zevin points out that every civil society has laws. People make laws and people change laws. What is different about our laws? What separates us from the rest of the world is this one little letter, this connector,the vav. We might mistakenly think that what makes us unique as a culture are ourritual practices and observances. While these are beautiful modes of practice, they are not what truly set us apart as a society, because rituals abound in every culture. What's unique about our religious way of life is that our standards of civility are of Divine origin.

Rav Elchanon Wasserman suggests that the true meaning of "Tzidkatcha tzedek le'olam veToratchah emet" – “Your justice is just forever, and Your Torah is true” is that Jewish law is fair because the Torah is true. It is that divinity of Torah that sets us apart and that makes our laws true.

Jews of all ages and backgrounds without exception need to constantly reinforce within ourselves our belief in the divinity of our laws, specifically the societal laws. Rabbinic tradition permeates the religious lives we live. Trusting and respecting the rabbinic system is key to our continued commitment to traditional Jewish life. It is possible, yet tragic, to emerge from an upbringing in a traditional Jewish community without respect for halacha as a true way of life. It is possible to live in an Orthodox community and not get that the way we are to relate to and treat others is a holy, Divine matter.

The Vav that links the Mishpatim to G-d must be studied and our commitment to this connection must always grow stronger. May G-d bless us that it should be so.

"...and one of them was me." - Carly Simon

Every pleasure fades

Every pain fades

Every joy fades

Every sadness fades

Everything fades

Until your life

You yourself

fade

(As is always the case, unless otherwise indicated)

By Rabbi Neil Fleichmann

© 2011

"Well now, everything dies, baby, that's a fact

But maybe everything that dies someday comes back"

Did You Know This Tune Was Beautiful?

Winter Break - "A Season With Snow"

Bansky would be proud of me because I exited through the gift shop. Actually, he'd be appalled (though I wonder how he feels about being nominated for an Oscar). But I love museum gift shops, I got a nice box of blank cards - big fan of those. The main feature was an exhibit on Houdini. There were some interesting thoughts presented about the connection between magic and art. And who knew Norman Mailer portrayed Houdini in a movie?

I wish I would have liked this play more. I have come to feel a strong affinity for Lewis and the characterization of him in this play didn't fit. He came across as wisenheimer rather than as a loving, gentle soul. True he had to contend with Freud's sharpness, still that disposition just didn't seem right. It's probably a better play than a lot of what's out there (I think the last play I saw was Inherit the Wind, some years ago), but I'm not sure that's enough to recommend it.

I passed by this museum/library, walked in, caught a tour just starting and learned somethings. The tour guide talked exclusively, not great teaching. The material kind of spoke for itself. The best room was not included in the tour: a display on diaries. Doodles, and notes, and confessions of famous people in journals, and notebooks, and backs of atlases. Way cool.

As I type, James Taylor sings, "I'm gone - say nice things about me." Can you name the song? (The words may be improvised, as it's a live version and he likes to do that.)

The other day a friend alerted me to a beautiful line from Mishlei - 10:12

שִׂנְאָה, תְּעֹרֵר מְדָנִים; וְעַל כָּל-פְּשָׁעִים, תְּכַסֶּה אַהֲבָה

Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs.

There's a lot to that line. I'm thinking a lot about it. I'm not going to write a lot about it - for now.

Here's a link to something I posted a few months back. I just received the email again.

Here's an edit of a poem I wrote years ago:

I am pleased to know

Those who pass my way

Grow into haiku

The following was written and performed collaboratively. To me a wow, big time. Sigh.

Handle With Care

By Petty, Tom; Orbison, Roy; Harrison, George; Dylan, Bob; Lynne, Jeff, 1988

Been beat up and battered 'round
Been sent up, and I've been shot down
You're the best thing that I've ever found
Handle me with care

Reputations changeable
Situations tolerable
Baby, you're adorable
Handle me with care

I'm so tired of being lonely
I still have some love to give
Won't you show me that you really care

Everybody's got somebody to lean on
Put your body next to mine, and dream on

I've been fobbed off, and I've been fooled
I've been robbed and ridiculed
In day care centers and night schools
Handle me with care

Been stuck in airports, terrorized
Sent to meetings, hypnotized
Overexposed, commercialized
Handle me with care

I'm so tired of being lonely
I still have some love to give
Won't you show me that you really care

Everybody's got somebody to lean on
Put your body next to mine, and dream on

I've been uptight and made a mess
But I'll clean it up myself, I guess
Oh, the sweet smell of success
Handle me with care

A packet of 12 bookmarks featuring the art of Dorothea Barlowe with quotes by Thoreau on the back cost $1.50 at the Morgan museum gift shop. Hurry, while supplies last:

Nature is full genius,

full of The Divinity

so that not a

snowflake escapes its

fashioning hand.

We discover a new

world every time that

we see the earth again

after it has been covered

for a season with snow.

Short Poem

Hope

All is well

"Shalom, Shalom..."

"Shalom is one of Hashem's names

because He is Shaleim.

Similarly, when I say Shalom to you,

I wish upon you internal and external shleimut.

Hope you're well."

Several years ago I posted two lovely emails I'd received. Soon after I posted, each person asked me to please not post anything they email me, even if it's lovely and anonymous. I've kept my word. Thankfully, my friend cited above never made such a request. That's the email in its entirety up above. I wrote back, but probably won't hear from him for a while. Still, when you come into a landfall of blessing, you can't just expect to come into that kind of thing again so fast.

_________________________

This poem reminds me of my name and the one place (Iyov 14:9) it's used with my vowels and as a noun in all of Tanach. Iyov says that a tree is, in a way, superior to a man. When you cut a tree down, you can give it a little water and before long it's good as new, while this is not the case regarding man:

The Term William Carlos Williams
A rumpled sheet Of brown paper About the length And apparent bulk Of a man was Rolling with the Wind slowly over And over in The street as A car drove down Upon it and Crushed it to The ground. Unlike A man it rose Again rolling With the wind over And over to be as It was before.

Poet Tree (the fruit, called a poem is possible to eat.)

At the end of davening this morning the Dvar Torah of the day was pros and cons of early and late Shabbos Shacharis. The speaker felt that a major motivation for such minyanim is to miss the rabbi's speech. I think rabbis are on to that and now often appear to speak at each minyan.

As I type this , the song Happy Together is playing. It's a great tune and yet - I wonder if there's ever been a worse rhyme written than, "So happy together, so how is the weather?" The next song up is Peace Train, to me a wow.

After minyan I went to Grandma's and bought a whole wheat bagel with egg whites. I returned home to read from my new anthology of poet laureates. I'm pleased with that investment. At the same time I bought that (at Westsider Books, between 80-81, on Broadway) I purchased two other books. Nothing To Be Frightened Of, is "a memoir on mortality" - if you trust an inside flap. I seem to remember this getting strong reviews. And I definitely remember really liking a story he had in The New Yorker. It was called The Limner and was published two years ago, almost to the day.

I always say that my favorite short story is (Wait for it - first I'll tell you some close seconds: The Bear Went Over The Mountain by Alice Munro, and A Good Man Is Hard To Find by Flannery O'Connor. I don't think either of them ever wrote a story that didn't work for me.) In Dreams Begin Responsibilities, by Delmore Schwartz. I used to own it, and now I own it again. It's one of the first stories in a collection of film related writings, called Roger Ebert's Book of Film. It clearly resonates for Ebert, as it did for the Partisan Review, which published it in its first issue (even though it doesn't seem to resonate for most people I share it with - sigh).

The new New Yorker just arrived, and Alice Munro has a story in it! My problem with the New Yorker is that there's too much in each issue that I want to read. On the bus back from Quebec City, one eleventh grade boy was reading the New Yorker. (I mean, just one that I noticed. It was probably a lot more.)

I wrote this today:

Gorgeous yet common

Poems are windblown weeds

Like dandelions

Poets do not grow on trees

Whatever would we call them?

I'm Being Followed...

At Shabbos lunch the woman of the house raised the issue of how it was suddenly striking to her when she read that morning that not to be jealous was up there in the big ten. The man of the house, a Talmudic scholar, and I suggested that it's not just being jealous but defined by most early commentators as involving some action or at least a plan. And then I said that I think there's mussar in it that, yes - middot really do matter. Thoughts and feelings are at least as much a part of what G-d expects us to sculpt into our beings as actions.

---------------------------------------------

A man says to an old Jewish woman, "I haven't eaten in three days." She replies, "Force yourself." At the moment I'm content living more and blogging less, it's kind of a dream. And yet, I am committed to this blog; it's one of my sharing places (yes, I just used the phrase "sharing places.")

If you want me to buy a book a good way to get me to do so is to have Billy Collins edit it and write the forward. This tactic worked last week for Bright Wings. It worked again tonight for The Poets Laureate Anthology.

The former is a collection of poems about birds. Here's an out of the norm one from that work:

FROM WOODY'S RESTAURANT, MIDDLEBURY

Today, noon, a young macho friendly waiter and three diners,
business types --two males, one female--
are in a quandary about the name of the duck paddling
Otter Creek,
the duck being brown, but too large to be a female mallard.
They really
want to know, and I'm the human-watcher behind the nook
of my table,
camouflaged by my stillness and nonchalant plumage.
They really want to know.
This sighting I record in the back of my Field Guide to People. back of my Field Guide to People.y procured (hot off the press at a discount book store on around 79th and Broadway) is just what the title says it will be. Here's a strong one from the Poet Laureate of the United States, 1997 - 2000:my strategy. When I had

Another Purple Mountain

My Shabbos She Took Neshamah and Ran For The Whole Week

Shabbos was nice - what a lukewarm word. Details are key to writing and to life. Shabbos included sitting next to a student (now in medical school) in Shul, and having another student (now in eleventh, who I taught in tenth) come over to shake my hand and say Good Shabbos. Shabbos included stumping a table with the question, what four people in the Torah say Baruch Hashem. Then I was stumped by a trick question - what one letter doesn't appear in Parshat Yitro. I also accidentally stumped a sixth grader by mentioning Yitro instead of Yisro. I witnessed a three year old move from cold anger to warm love in about fifteen minutes time. I discussed Tourette's with someone who has it and confirmed that the tics are the key. So someone I know seems to have been sloppily slapped with the label. I ate no cake/dessert at both meals. A friend of mine recently pointed out the simple logic of not eating dessert after you just ate a meal. Why do that to yourself? It reminds me of Rabbi Abraham Twerski's anger at a Gadol studded Melave Malka years ago, where after the lavish meal a lavish (obscene?) Viennese table was brought out. He wondered aloud why no Rav commented on the inappropriateness of such a spread in light of Kedoshim Tihiyu as understood by Ramban (and canonized into Judaism 101).

I heard that the Gra spoke at the lavaya of Graf Petofsky of the holiness of a convert. I think it was Dovid who said "Baruch atah Hashem." And someone else great (Avraham or Moshe?) said three words before Hashem's name, but Yitro said just one word. Cool.

I also heard in the name of the Shemen HaTov that the greatness of Yitro's baruch Hashem was that it was said about the good fortune of others! This reminded me of the Gemorah which says that if you daven for someone else you get answered first. I think the idea is that there's something spiritually sophisticated about recognizing that G-d is the G-d of everyone, not just you. To the extent that you realize that (as illustrated by sincerely praying for another) that then G-d will meet your human need of getting an answer to what you asked for.

TREES

By Joyce Kilmer

I think that I shall never see

A poem lovely as a tree.

A tree whose hungry mouth is prest

Against the sweet earth's flowing breast;

A tree that looks at God all day,

And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

A tree that may in summer wear

A nest of robins in her hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;

Who intimately lives with rain.

Poems are made by fools like me,

But only God can make a tree.

‎"Isn't it nice to know a lot! - And a little bit not."

Two essays I wrote on Yitro: one - about the image of eagle's wings, and a second about why Rashi combines two midrashic opinions regarding what Yitro heard, and says he heard both.

Yesterday I watched a wonderful documentary by Werner Herzog, Encounters at the End of the World. He's a force of nature himself, and the film is remarkable - it is both about the geographical and (G-d forbid) historical end of the world. Fascinating.

I just finished watching half of the filmed for TV version of the play Into the Woods. The Times' reviews says that when it was previewed people thought it was done at the intermission. It feels that way. It seems that in the second half things are going to turn dark. Maybe I should do what I did with Who Is Harry Nilsson (And Why Is Everybody Talkin' About Him?) and skip the part where the bottom falls out.

I am with cold. I need to go healthy, and herbal and all that jazz.

I had a helpful talk with a talmid-chaver this morning. In short, I need to write things here that are tiferet le'oseha vetiferet lo min ha'adam. Or to use an expression my mother - OBM - used to like, "When in doubt, leave it out." This is true in general regarding writing or speaking, if the best you can do after saying something is maybe not lose out, then don't share it. The odds are better that way.

It's been a few years since I mentioned Chana Rothman. You can hear her songs for free here, with the option to purchase. I thought of Chana and her song, More Than One Way, on Martin Luther King Day. It would provide good theme music to a video on civil rights. I like all the songs of hers that I've heard. Chana is wise as is evident in her saying that "the truth hurts but it opens your eyes." That reminds me a bit of a comment by another singer/songwriter, Carrie Grossman who says that "Disappointment, I've learned, can be a very good friend -- shattering illusions."

Poetic Posts Past

Here's a backwards alphabetical acrostic poem that I wrote and that Miss Trudy liked.

Here's a post about the idea of carrying a new poem in your pocket every day (sample poem included).

Here's a thought and a poem from Oscar season four years ago.

Here's an excerpt of a poem in a post about sitting at my sailboat spot (picture of painting that has since been let go of included).

Here's what I wrote for the blog's fourth anniversary (full sailboat poem included).

Tu BiShvat Higia

Over the summer I kept track of the vacation days, at least at the start. It was the first time I did that, and it's now the first time I'm tracking winter vacation. Welcome to Day 2.

Today is Tu Bishvat. It has arrived.

Purple Mountain

Happy Birthday Paul

Years ago I used to see the president of the university I live nearby entering his limousine. I would marvel over the fact that if he walked one block over, the urban locals would have no idea who he was. I think about this often, and how it applies broadly - the idea that a world can vanish in a short amount of time or space.

I am in winter break. It's quite a jump. I'm worn from work, still. Trying to breathe and breathe again. I've said it before, and I'll keep saying it - there's something about breathing, it makes me feel alive.

As Promised Yesterday

Pre Winter Break In The Afternoon

2:30 PM - I haven't been a super big fan of the studio albums of Jethro Tull since Heavy Horses (1978) and I'm told that's more than a few years ago. And yet. They were something different that I liked long before I started purposely liking things that were different.

The song linked below is one I think I just heard for the first time. It reminds me a lot of Another Harry's Bar. The last concert I saw, shortly before my mom passed away, was Ian Anderson (Tull's lead singer). Long may he run.

In five I have a vaad, a meeting with a class that I do (for two different classes every other week). I've taught five classes so far. And after the vaad I have one more Chumash class. And then - winter break.

4:05 PM - The vaad went really nicely. This is a group of kids who really enjoy learning. I mentioned a chiastic structure I did in my class and one girl wanted to write it down just like that. I told them how the first half of Lech Lechah is about past and the second half about building on that to the future. And that reminded me of the explanation I learned for why vayehi is sad and vehayah is happy (the vav hamehapechet in each case, respectively, changed future tense to past and past to future. When we build on our past it's happy, when we cut off our future it's sad).

It's funny (not ha-ha) that soon, probably the next time I write here, my reality/realm will have shifted due to two words - winter break.

The Middle Is The Most Difficut Time

Is it about me? -

Things people say and do...

...We are each human

It's a few minutes to minchah and I really need a prayer break.

Sometimes I say I've been here fifteen years and I feel like I'm wearing a badge of honor. Sometimes I feel worn, pride aside.

Truth, honesty, that's what we have in life.

Blessed and happy are those who feel that at any time, whatever else is happening - they are sitting in G-d's house.

Introduction by the Author

By FRAN LEBOWITZ

All modesty is false.

All strangers are perfect.

All musicals are revivals.

All pets are adopted.

All smoke is secondhand.

All vegetables are organic.

All mothers are single.

All favorites are sentimental.

All consciences are guilty.

All suspicions are sneaking.

All endings are happy.

All fanatics are religious.

No thought is consoling.

No speculation is idle.

There’s no business not like show business.

Fran Lebowitz, a contributing editor for Vanity Fair,

is the author of the forthcoming “Progress,”

which will be published within the century.

Rabbi Yaakov Lehrfield, Rabbi of Young Israel of Staten Island, on Parshat Beshalach

"Azi vezimrat kah," according to Rashi, means, "My strength and the vengeance of G-d." (It sounds like it should mean "the song of G-d," but Rashi marshals a grammar based argument for why this is not the case.) (The Arizal makes an interesting use of the fact that zemer can mean to cut/prune or to rhapsodize/sing. He says that Pesukei Dezimrah are a preparatory process of prayer through pruning.)


The words that precede the phrase "Azi vezimrat kah," speak of how G-d proudly fought for us, drowning each and every horse and rider (Ga'oh, ga'ah - sus ve'rachbo ramah bayam.") The words that follow the phrase "Azi vezimrat kah," are generally translated as, "This is my G-d and I will adorn him."


In one of those cases where Unkelus proves to be a commentator, adding insightful words to his compact translation, he says that "Zeh keili ve'anveihu" refers specifically to building a Mikdash/Mishkan for G-d. The question arises; what's the connection between G-d destroying the Egyptian people and us building the Beit HaMikdash?


Dovid HaMelech was told that he was not permitted to fulfill his dream of building the Mishkan. The reason he was blocked from building a holy sanctuary is because his hands had spilled blood. Based on this we can understand the juxtaposition of these seemingly disparate thoughts on Az Yashir. We're told that G-d will do all the fighting for us, then we will be permitted (and expected) to build a Mishkan for Hashem.

Half Time

As the first term comes to an a close and vacation approaches

I look forward to a breathing break.

I also look back at a great half a year.

Here's a short video snippet of a Chanukah Chagigah that one

of my students and his family hosted for the class and teachers.

The kids that seem to be doing school work are putting finishing touches

on divrei Torah they are to deliver in a few moments.

Friday Before-Noon

A friend of mine is planning to speak this Shabbos about how the mahn that fell from heaven is described as a test. The Rashbam says that the test was if we would extrapolate from this divine gift that every day is a miracle. My friend asked if I had any ideas or stories relating to the idea of every moment of life being miraculous.


I remembered this piece, which I find remarkable, about Asher Yatzar.


While working I'm listening to Pandora and this just came on. I think I like it for a confluence of reasons. First of all it appeals to me musically, second of all it brings back memories of youth.

Work Pause

I've been logging many Torah Guidance hours, besides my 25 weekly teaching periods. Some issues that have arisen:

"How does one become comfortable with where he/she is at as a Jew? How come some people, even at a young age seem to know exactly who they are?"

Sometimes I show students the book, The Wisdom of A Starry Night, which is filled with thought provoking paintings and questions. Sometimes kids read through each one until they stop, on their own, at one that resonates for them. The other day someone paused and said, "That's a good one," regarding, "With whom would you like to reconnect?"

Also, someone was taken by the question, "What is your version of freedom?" And freely associated an answer.

A friend of mine just emailed me something that included Leonard Cohen's line, "There's a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in." That reminds me of a line from Rabbi Nachman of Brezlov, "There's nothing more whole than a broken heart." Also, that reminds me of a King David line (Psalms 51:19) - "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and a contrite heart, Oh God, Thou wilt not despise."

I just had an insight - this pasuk is usually understood to mean that G-d values our brokenness, but maybe what it's really saying is that our brokenness is a gift offering from G-d to us.

Roerich's Hut In The Mountains

The Theme To Beshalach

I'm thinking of Beshalach and of a take on it that I've posted here before. I like this approach, sad as it may be, and think about it often. I like it so much that when I was teaching Sefer Shmot a few years ago I adapted this into a lesson/PowerPoint and chose to give it on the day I was officially observed a few years back when Frisch was learning Shmot. Also, on one of the occasions when I've given the drasha at Mount Sinai Congregation in my neighborhood - Washington Heights - I presented this mehalech.

The basic idea (for those of you who don't like to click links) is that the theme of the parsha is that the Jewish People, upon leaving Egypt, have a hard time accepting G-d. In one situation after another they cry in unbearable frustration, not realizing that G-d will happily care for them - they needn't sweat it. In the end G-d employs another means to get his children to connect with him.

I recommend clicking on the post just to read the comment of a wise and sensitive (and anonymous) reader.

Two Wolves

One evening an old Cherokee Indian told his grandson about a battle that was going on inside him. He said, "My son, it is between 2 wolves." "One is evil: Anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego... The other is good: Joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith..." The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf wins?" The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one I feed."

- Received in an email some time ago

No Poem

The page remains blank

I want to write but can't

No haiku today

The death of a graduate of the Frisch school looms large. Other than the six periods I taught today, as Director of Torah Guidance there were a lot of questions coming to my office. Can a brother say kaddish for a year if he wants to? When can the brother's senior classmates expect him to return to normal? How could such a thing happen? How could G-d let it happen?

I spent quite a while listening, and some time talking. Effective teaching , pastoring, counselling involve more listening than talking - generally. I think that when it comes to theology (particularly what some dub theodicy) one has to say some response. I don't have the strength/desire to present such ideas here, but in organic, face to face conversations, my listening and also responding seemed to be helpful. G-d, I hope so.

Our principal was clearly pained as he addressed the school after minyan. There's a lot of community pain. No-one can imagine the family's pain.

The school will be there for the family as best that it can. Brother Aryeh will no doubt get a lot of support from his friends in his own twelfth grade and from every level of the school. Our hearts are broken over the Strobel family's loss of their beloved son Asher.

I often debate what to write here. I often hold back on names. I hope that the recent posts have been appropriate and perhaps meaningful to anyone affected by this loss. Feel free to contact me (nfleischmann1@gmail.com).

HAGD

I woke up thinking about the balance of body and soul. During my formative years, in terms of Jewish thought, I imbibed the idea that the relationship between our body and soul is like a horse and rider. Our soul is us and our body is merely a shell; one day the body falls away and we, the souls, our true selves, reunite with G-d.

The above thinking can lead to neglect of care for our bodies. On the other hand, many people have the opposite problem - caring for their bodies to the degree that it's hard to consider their soul at all.

A couple of years ago I was in a hotel for work and I went to the gym very early in the morning. I didn't have sneakers with me, but decided not to use that as an excuse. Afterwards, I wrote this poem:

Are Those Rubber Sole Shoes?

By Neil Fleischmann

n

One day my body

will fall away

like a peanut shell.

That's what I learned

in my yeshiva days.

n

Those were just words,

and that was long before

the nut started cracking,

filling with dotted lines

to tear upon.

n

Those were just words,

spoken with no due respect

to "the irrelevant piece,

the unessential

the husk."

n

I'm 45 and it's 7:20

treadmill sweat trickles my head.

I self inflict pain because I -

the rider and the horse -

I want to stay alive.

I wish all my readers, all the world, a great day of synergy between body and soul. Hillel was once stopped by his students on the way to the bathhouse and told them he was going to do a mitzvah. Care for our body, and of course for our soul, is a mitzvah. As an old woman in a Starbucks once turned to me and said, "The body goes, take care of it."

Sunday On The Bus

Seven hours plus into the bus ride there is a thin line between a sigh and a breath.

How amazing is it that can sit on a bus and type and within seconds you can read it anywhere in the world?!

"How many days would it take to clean every house in the world but mine?" - Beth Thornley (Don't Save Me). I listened to this song, after ignoring it on my Ipod for years. I listened to others by her too; she's good.

The movie choices weren't to my taste. Hoosiers is a good move, and that was the third choice - which I've seen before and we're probably not going to get to, but it's what I call a movie. First up was Iron Man Two, which bored me to a good sleep. Batman Begins was more distracting.

If it was an independent movie made today, or I dare say, a Hollywood movie made in the seventies (one thing the seventies was good at, rather than mediocre about), it might have gone the distance and been really good.

Update - as I write this Hoosiers was just started, though we only have an hour-ish left to the trip.

‎"I wouldn't dare tell you what to do with your past sir; just know that there are those who care what you do with your future." - Alfred, in Batman Begins (viewed with half an eye and heard with half an ear.

"It's not who I am underneath, but the actions I take that define me" - Bruce Wayne's girl friend to him (saying you, instead of I) and later Batman to her, when she asks him who he is.

What do you think of these quotes?

As I write this Hoosiers is grabbing my attention. It's a better movie than the others we watched. John Q had a few good moments, but this is a good whole film, too bad we'll have to turn it off as it builds to the denouement (I love using that word) (builds).

I'm thinking back about this trip. My camera seems broken, maybe these things die after six years (Canon Powershot). So my memories live inside me and on the page, but not in pictures.

Rabbi David Goldfischer, Director of Student Activities, spoke about going through life saying about himself that he's "not a math student." Rabbi Maish Taragin heard him say that once and said that one shouldn't box oneself in like that. David tied it in with the medrashic story about how Nachshon was the first Jew who jumped into the water. His take on this was that Nachshon, unlike the other Jews, was willing to break the habit of saying "I'm not a freedom person." This reminded me of the saying of Chazal, ""Al tehi rasha bifnei atzmecha." My favorite take on this, is that one shouldn't limit oneself, saying "I'm just a Yom Kippur Jew," or "I'm not a learner."

A boy spoke and said in two minutes what some rabbis would have gone on and on about. David Warner nailed the idea that for slaves it made sense to be granted control of their time. This is why the mitzvah of setting a new month was the first mitzvah given to the new nation of former slaves.

My colleague, Head of Admissions, Rabbi Jon Schachter adapted a shiur of Vaeira and Bo (the makkot) by Rabbi Yitzchak Twerski (formely my colleague, teacher and Head of Tanach Depatment in Frisch for 14 years). Rabbi Twerski, based on the Tzror HaMor, and other says that the plagues in Egypt were an undoing of the creation of the world. He maps out the reverse parallels. The point is that the world needed another new start. Rather than destroy everyone and start all over again, as He's done in the past, G-d decided to do something else. He destroyed the country that was considered the pinnacle of civilization, but in truth lacked a moral center. And he established the Jews as a new nation and - hopefully - as a conscience for the world.

Need to close for now. We'll be getting to school soon, please G-d.